How To Meet Men
(And KEEP The Good One!)

Have you ever said these things to yourself or a friend:

- There are no good guys out there...

- I'm sick of going to bars... Where else can I go to meet men?

- How do you meet men when you're trying to build a career?

By now you know that I'm not going to give you a glib answer for this. You know that my special insight for you is to translate what men want into something that you can leverage to make your own romantic dreams come true.

And in the process, I want to show you how to command the kind of self-respect that most women never build, and which eventually causes massive pain and heartache in their relationships.

What I'm going to give you is a three-dimensional answer to this question: HOW TO MEET MEN - so that you can see the real truth behind your thinking.

First of all, I want to familiarize you with a little-known trait of human beings. (This trait is common for men AND women, by the way.) When you understand this gremlin of our emotions, you'll be able to resist its evil influence.

It's called the Anti-Gratitude Mechanism.
(Not to be confused with anti-gravity, by the way... :-)

Big words, but an easy concept.

You see, over the hundreds of thousands of years that humans have been around, we've really had only ONE thing to do with our time.

SOLVE PROBLEMS.

That's it.

To stay alive and out-fox all the other predators and rivals, we had to learn how to solve all the complicated challenges that nature put to us. As women, you had to solve more complicated social challenges as well. (And guys think they had it tough...)

We have survived and thrived mostly because we developed a large part of our brain matter to help us solve the problems we're faced with every day. Whether it was finding food, or reading a social situation, or running away from rabid mammoths, we had problems to manage and solve.

Now, the reality is that we don't have may of those physical challenges to your survival like we once did, so now we've got a lot of time to sit around and ponder the "bigger" questions of life.

Like why no one from "Friends" has done anything big since the show ended...

Or why we can't help looking at the covers of the magazines with the latest photos of celebrity cellulite... (Yeah, I do it, too. Sigh.)

Or why guys have to open up conversations with cheesy pickup lines...

And how to meet more men.

But, seriously, we have all this time on our hands to THINK, and it really makes things more difficult. Because that same thinking gives us a lot of time to find all the things that are WRONG with our lives and our relationships.

Sometimes you really get caught up in the fact that you DON'T have a man in your life, and you lose the gratitude for the things you DO have. While you're thinking about how to meet men, your life is moving forward...

Sorry, I don't want to sound like a Hallmark card here, but it's important to always consider that the discontent you feel - especially when you don't feel like you've got the kind of relationship in your life that you want - may be fabricated because your mind is a little ...

... well, BORED.

The first solution should always be to engage in something that interests YOU and drives YOU forward.

In a recent best-selling book about female development, the author discusses one of the stages of women's growth as eventually changing from caring about their young children and others to focusing on herself.

It's my belief that we all need to focus on balancing this desire out much earlier in life so that it doesn't overwhelm us later on to the point where we pull entirely into our own world. I'm sure you've felt that "crash" after you feel like you've given too much.

So why not start now, and also increase your happiness, AND your ability to meet men?

Here's a few steps you can take today to not only balance your life out more, but also find the meaningful "distractions" you need to make you feel more complete to a man when you meet him.

1) Get out with the RIGHT people...

One thing I've noticed is that there are a lot of negative people out there. You've probably noticed this, too.

One of the worst things for your attitude and motivation is to go out with the women that have already "made up their mind" about what will happen when they go out.

You know these women. Sometimes they're magnets for the wrong kind of guys because of the vibe they put out, sometimes they're just a bad influence because of their negativity.

Yes, sometimes they're the only friends you can get to go out ... because they're single and they're looking, too. But consider WHY they're still single.

Don't let that taint your chances when the right man comes along that you'd like to meet.

The critical part of the equation is their positive attitude. If they have it, great.

If they don't, it's time to find some women that will help your situation. Place an ad for one on Craigslist or any of the many sites that help people that want to connect.

Trust me, there are millions of women out there wondering how to meet men, too. They're also looking for the right "wing-woman" to do it with.

You may feel like you're losing a tie with your existing friends if you avoid going out with them, but that's not really the case.

I'm not saying you have to get rid of them completely from your life. Quite the opposite. When you've got a good method of keeping your positive attitude, it will help you turn those friends around for the better.

2) Sometimes, be daring and go out with a GUY friend.

Here's a little gem that not many of the other "advisers" out there will tell you about...

Women often get into the comfortable trap of going out with the same friends every time they go out, and they end up going along with plans that may not suit them, or the go out with women - as I said above - that don't help their cause.

So go out with a guy you know (and that knows you're both just friends.)

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that you'll discourage a man from approaching you when you're hanging out with another man.

NOT true, and if you think back to the times guys approached you when you were with a boyfriend, you'll know what I mean.

Just keep your body language non-flirtatious with your wingman and other guys will pick up on it. Also, go solo for short periods to give men the opening they need to approach you.

The key here is to go out with a guy that is positive and outgoing. You want him to be able to help you meet men, not a guy that will stand in a corner nursing his Bud light for 2 hours.

I've been the wingman for my female friends many times before, and being mutual matchmakers gets everyone's energy and enthusiasm up.

By the way, the opposite is true, too. Women find men who are hanging out with a woman friend attractive because he's not just another "lone wolf" out there. He's got the social proof of another woman around.

3) Go out to do the RIGHT things to meet men...

Do things that will put you out there in the best situation possible to meet men.

Going to bars later in the evening tends to draw the "party" crowd out, so the best time I've found for you to meet men is right after work at happy hour gatherings. This gives you a little decompression time after work, and you can still get home in time for a late repeat of "Scrubs."

And let's not forget that going to "non-singles" events are often a great possibility if you're wondering how to meet men.

Go to concerts, go to farmers markets (great hidden gem), go to sports events...

If you're not out there exposing yourself to opportunities to meet men, how do you think it will ever happen?

4) Go out and do DIFFERENT things to meet men - and fulfill YOURSELF.

This is probably the most important of all the tips I can give you, if only for the fact that it emphasizes how important it is to be working on your own lifestyle as much as you are your own answers to "How to meet men..."

The more these activities overlap, the better.

You see, one of the things I coach women (AND men) to do is to make it a part of your lifestyle to meet people and expand your social circle.

In a recent book about trends that build up and spread like wildfire, the author refers to these people as "connectors." They know more people, and as a result, they find more opportunities and social success.

I'm going to emphasize here that you must be doing these activities as much to fulfill yourself as you are to accomplish the "goal" of meeting men and getting more dates.

In order to keep a healthy attitude and do the right things over a period of time - keeping your motivation up, essentially - you can't just be pursuing the end result. It sounds like an obvious thing to say, but we do often get caught up in the result rather than the enjoyment of the activity.

Go to a soccer game ... or a street fair ... or something that you've always wanted to do. See what opportunities come up when you put yourself out there.

The key to meeting men is less about WHAT you're doing and more about how you're keeping a healthy attitude up while you go through the process.

I recognized this a while back, and I always wondered why the other dating and relationship advisers never really covered it.

I also realized that women out there need a set of practical tools for developing their dating skills. So I created the "Get Your Man" program to teach you the fundamental skills for dating.

Learning how to attract men is simple - if you know what he's REALLY thinking in there. It's not all about the sports statistics and the last Playboy centerfold, either.

Most women don't know how to trigger the kind of attraction in a man that makes him devoted and truly attached to you. When you learn the right methods for working on your relationship - and yourself - you will have the kind of loving and nurturing relationship that your girlfriends would kill for.

If you'd like to learn the secret strategies that will help you get into a man's head and figure out just what men want in a woman, go take a look at my program, and be sure to read the testimonials of the women who have had such incredible success with the information.

Click here to learn: How to Get Your Man - and KEEP Him...

Your friend,

Carlos