A big part of my philosophy of life is that if you just STOP doing the stuff that isn't working or is keeping you from what you want, you'll get the success you desire.
Because very often all this other negative stuff is keeping you from seeing the path to what you desire.
This works for happiness, love, money, and so much more in life.
I thought it was important to help you understand that if you just work on "changing your scent" a bit, you'll find that you can attract a completely different kind of guy.
(And no, I’m not talking about your perfume.)
So with that in mind, let's talk about how to do this right...
The simple fact is that most women don't know what kind of guy they really want. And so they settle for just any kind of guy out there.
This is the first step to relationship disaster. You can avoid a ton of unfulfilled expectations and disappointment by just making the effort to consider what you want in a guy.
To get you started, here are a few things you should think about. This isn't an exhaustive list of course, but it will point you in the right direction:
Don't seek physical qualities. The truth is that women are much more flexible in terms of physical appearance in men than men typically are of women.
But the truth is the same for both genders: We fall for people who just "click" with us.
The problem is that if you haven't defined that "click", you will likely just end up with someone who gives you that quick shot of happy chemistry.
If you don't know what it is you're bringing to the table, it's very easy to fall for anyone that comes along. Knowing the kind of value you add to a relationship will help you figure out which kind of guys you WANT to attract.
So another round of soul-searching is in order. To get started, think about what you want out of a relationship.
For instance, you probably feel that your relationship should...
Once you go through this process, you'll probably ask yourself an important question:
Have you been changing yourself to accommodate the relationship? -
- or is it the other way around?
From here, you'll be closer to knowing your contribution. That's because you'll have a much clearer idea of the way you want your relationship to work.
There are so many questions to ask yourself, but it's critical to know for yourself what you need in your relationship dynamic.
There is a lot to learn from the past, so don't hesitate to take some time to reflect on your past relationships. Most women won't go there, mostly to avoid awakening old emotions and regrets.
After this going through this little journey, you should be able to answer this next question:
You have a unique combination of strengths and talents that give a relationship a kind of flair that no one else can. Think about your qualities and how they add to the relationship, and from there you'll be able to come up with something like this:
"I love to travel and learn from other cultures. That makes me a well-rounded woman who's not afraid to go out of her comfort zone and take on new challenges. I'm also very expressive verbally and emotionally. That makes me naturally good at communicating clearly and avoiding any misunderstandings. I am a fan of personal growth, and that makes a supportive partner who wants to grow in a relationship together with my man."
It can be longer or shorter than that example above, but make sure it captures the essence of your best traits and how it translates into being a great girlfriend - or eventual spouse.
Certain men will go to certain places in his spare time or recreational time. High-quality men with a desire to get into a relationship will probably not be going to the same places as the not-as-desirable guys.
BUT - there may be an overlap.
Some guys just don't know of any other place to go other than singles bars. So they go there, expecting great things, and keep running into the wrong people for them.
It's a meat market where no woman over 30 feels very comfortable, which means bars and clubs are just not a great route.
Here's where men typically go to meet quality women and a real relationship:
Think of the ones you don't want as "dating spam." Unavoidable, but manageable with the right method. And it has the advantage of being a "target rich environment" - meaning that there is simply going to be a higher number of available men online dating than others places you go to.
So you're trading convenience for a more concentrated environment.
I know from personal experience that most women hate this method of meeting men - which means that you have an opportunity here if you can put aside your prejudices and just work it.
Besides, men want women who have a sense of self. And doing what YOU enjoy will bring you together on common ground.
Men are keen receivers of subtle signals that you might take for granted. It may not look like it sometimes, but we have that radar silently running in the background (and we might not be even aware of it either!).
Most women would be stunned to know what men can sense in a relationship. We might lack some emotional awareness, but we do pick up on signals.
Think about the kind of signals that broadcast your inner state to the world.
Ask yourself - do you send these signals...
And if you find that you attract a certain kind of guy most of the time, you're either spending too much time in their environment, or you're giving off a scent they just can't resist.
Here are some of the wrong signals:
And - finally....
Honestly, a big part of finding the right man (and avoiding the wrong one) is appealing to a man's desire for a long-term, committed relationship.
Here's the Truth: Almost ALL men want a committed relationship.
You might think, "But none of the guys I've dated has wanted that!"
Until you run into him a few months or years later and BOOM - the same guy is married with kids.
WTF?? What happened?
It happens because of the UGLY part of that Truth I just shared. Yes, men want commitment - but here's what most women don't realize:
On top of that, you also need to make him FEEL certain things. This will put him in a place where he's READY to make that commitment.
In other words, he doesn't want a woman that's on the hunt for a committed relationship ALONE. He's looking for a woman who ALSO wants to give him what HE needs so that he will feel safe giving what he can give to you.
A man has an incredible capacity to provide for a woman. Not just financial support, but also provide a safe and loving connection in the relationship.
But you have to know how to let him know that you're the RIGHT kind of woman.
Unfortunately, this is something that most women don't know how to do anymore.
But it's not your fault!
Moms in the last 20-40 years or so haven't been shown this skill. And fathers dropped the ball, too, failing to train men in how to "man up" and be men.
Back in the 1970s, when everyone was fanatically talking about "women's liberation", a gradual shift occurred.
Moms started holding back on showing women how to use their heart-centered natural skill of loving femininity. And we're starting to slide back into this distraction from the REAL empowerment of women.
If you want to know the shocking truth about what men really want in a relationship...
...and how you are uniquely positioned to create the romance of a lifetime - I have a presentation that will help you discover the Truth you've been missing out on.
It's the missing piece of the love and dating puzzle you didn't know you needed until now. CLICK HERE to find out how to get the commitment you want without pushing him away.
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The 7 Mistakes Women Make That Make Men Pull Away...
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