Why the Dating Game Sucks and 3 Ways to Deal With It

By: Carlos Cavallo
 |

You’re dressed to kill, ready to be your fun, flirty self and raring to rock your date’s world. But despite your best efforts, your soulmate-to-be turned out to be another dud.

That’s just the reality of meeting and going out with men – sometimes, things don’t go according to plan.

You hope for the best, but you just can’t seem to catch a break. And when you’ve had your expectations crushed one time too many, it can wear out even the most optimistic woman.

So you end up asking yourself, “Where are all the decent, funny, good-looking guys hiding…and why can’t I land one no matter how hard I try?”

It would be so much easier if you could just look into a crystal ball and know exactly when and where Mr. Right is going to be.

But the fact is that you’ll never really know when you’ll “hit it big” and finally meet the guy who’s right for you.

iStock 000058511858 Full 300x200 Why the Dating Game Sucks and 3 Ways to Deal With It

One of the basic (and awful) truths about dating is that you don’t have any control over a big part of the process, like your date’s character and intentions, for example.

And the thought of that can make anyone feel helpless. However, there are a few things you can do take ownership of your dating life – and happiness.

#1: Understand That Happiness is a Relative Concept

Ever heard the expression “More money, more problems”?

Just look at the billionaire CEOs and celebrities driving their lives right to the ground in spite of everything they have.

Contrary to what MOST of us think, having a big pile of cash lying around doesn’t guarantee we’re always going to be happy.

In fact, what we believe will make us happy won’t actually do the trick.

And that applies to dating as well. You might assume that a certain kind of guy is going to give you your “happily ever after”, but the expectations in our heads don’t always correlate to reality.

Who knows, the free-spirited, take-me-where-the-blows type you always pictured yourself falling in love with might not be the ONLY good match for you. Maybe that feeling of fun and freedom isn’t the only criteria for an ideal relationship.

Who says dating a 9-to-5, straight-arrow kind of guy won’t provide you just as much happiness - even without the whirlwind romance you’ve dreamed about?

Who says he can’t offer you just as much excitement as other types of men?

#2: Get a New Perspective on Dating

If you want to look at the business of dating guys in a more positive light, here’s my recommendation: keep your eyes OFF the prize.

One of the things I notice with a lot of women is that they tend to focus too much on the end result when they should be enjoying the ride.

When people get on the roller coaster, they don’t tell themselves, “Boy, I’m really looking forward to seeing the end of this track!”

It’s all about savoring the anticipation, enjoying the sudden twists and turns, and above all, having a blast.

If you lose sight of this, you’ll just end up feeling horrible when your date doesn’t have that picture-perfect Hollywood ending that you envisioned.

As a result, you’ll feel like a failure if things turn out to be less than perfect. That’s not a healthy attitude to have about dating - or men in general.

Here’s what you do before getting on a date: take all those anxieties and doubts, roll them into a nice little ball, and tell yourself, “screw the outcome” as you chuck it out the window.

Who needs that mental baggage anyway?

Just concentrate on looking your best and having the best possible time with your guy. Stop hemming and hawing – squeeze out every drop of enjoyment from the experience.

Even if he doesn’t end up being the right guy for you, just think of dating as playing a video game with an infinite stack of quarters.

I’ll let you in on a little secret: that’s how a lot of guys think.

Got turned down or rejected? No problem –just drop in that proverbial quarter and start over.

#3: Get Back In Touch With Your Idealistic Self

Remember the time when you were still new to dating and imagined your happy ending? Maybe you ran through different scenarios, and pictured yourself how wonderful it would turn out to be.

Now that you’ve met a handful of guys – and even got into a relationship with some of them –that sense of excitement might have diminished somewhat.

I’ve seen this happen to a lot of women. After a few bad experiences, that part of them seems to have taken a backseat, making them jaded and desperate about the dating game.

So, I’d like you to go back to that state of mind. You need to look forward to going out with guys rather than dreading the failed outcome in your head.

To keep yourself from falling into that trap, try imagining exactly what your ideal guy is like, and how you’d spend the perfect day with him.

iStock 000019566412 Double 300x287 Why the Dating Game Sucks and 3 Ways to Deal With It

Try narrowing down every detail possible, like your outfit and his, or where your date will take place.

Is he wearing a nice pair of flattering jeans with a clean crisp shirt? Are you wearing that cute summer dress with your favorite sneakers?

Will you spend the day getting lost in a foreign city where do you don’t speak a lick of the language? Will you explore coffee shops, book stores and just about every nook and cranny?

Will you spend the day having heartfelt conversations about life and love?

When will be the exact moment you’ll feel that connection, look into each other’s eyes and finally kiss?

Doesn’t it feel wonderful to think about it?

“But what’s the point of doing that?” you might ask.

Well, I want you to go back to the time when you felt that exhilaration from just thinking of all the wonderful possibilities that await you.

Getting hurt from your past experiences might have made you afraid to open yourself up, but those possibilities have always been there.

But now is the time to reacquaint yourself with your heart’s romantic desires. More importantly, you have to understand that there’s hardly a short supply of men who can make those dreams come true.

There are PLENTY of guys just like the one you imagined. It’s just a matter of renewing your faith in the fact that they’re out there and waiting to meet someone like you.

Eventually, you’ll realize that dating isn’t the ultra-competitive, soul-crushing rat race that a lot of people make it out to be.

Getting back into the dating game with an optimistic mindset might seem hard at first.

The fear of failing can pull your self-confidence right from under your feet, but there is a way to feel 100% secure in yourself no matter what happens.

If that’s the case for you, it’s time you worked on your irresistibility and confidence levels. My course called “Irresistible Desire” will give you a perfect set of dating tools to help you flirt with guys and attract them with ease.

Click here NOW to find out more.

Chemistry In A Relationship - Do you have it? Find out…

Chemistry is one of those things that almost seems mystical. And if you don't know what you're looking for, you might not know if you have chemistry in relationship. Everybody talks about chemistry. And it is really important. If you don't have chemistry in your relationship, chances are your passion will just flicker and die […]

Read More
Communication In A Relationship - 9 Tips To Reach Your Man

Any woman who has been in a relationship knows that communication is one of the most important things. In fact, if you don't have communication in a relationship, you don't really have a relationship. But how do you communicate with guys? Men can seem so difficult to talk to. The funny thing is, to men, […]

Read More
How To Be Mysterious - And Make Any Man Desire You

If you ever watched a movie where a woman seduced a man, you may have wondered how to be mysterious like that. How do you make yourself attractive and alluring by being mysterious? Unfortunately, most women don't learn the ancient art of how to use their Feminine Mystique anymore. It's very rare that girls are […]

Read More
Questions To Ask A Guy Over Text

If you've ever found yourself wanting to flirt or just reconnect with a guy, you probably wish you knew some questions to ask a guy over text. This article is going to be different, though. Instead of giving you a bunch of careless questions, I'm going to give you the kinds of questions you MUST […]

Read More
What To Do When He Is Pulling Away From You - 7 Tips

Nothing sends a chill down your spine faster than knowing that your man is growing cold and distant. And when you feel that happening, you need to know what to do when he is pulling away from you. Distance is the one thing that panics men and women. The problem with guys is that they […]

Read More
What To Talk About With A Guy - 18 Tips

Have you ever been talking with a man and found yourself wondering what to say next? You wonder what to talk about with a guy… I'll be the first person to tell you that talking to a man is really not that difficult. The problem is that you only learned how to talk to other […]

Read More
Are You Dating A Married Man? The 26 Rules - And How To NOT Get Hurt

Most women never set out to date a married guy. But for some reason this guy was so appealing and so interesting, and now you find yourself dating a married man. He could be a guy you work with, a guy you met at a party, or really anywhere. Maybe you started talking and realized […]

Read More
How To Make Him Jealous - And Love You More! - 12 Secrets

One of the most common problems a woman has is when a guy seems to be losing interest. And you know that one of the best ways to get him interested again it's figuring out how to make him jealous - and how to make him love you again. It always seems like he's got […]

Read More
Why Do Good Girls Like Bad Guys? 9 Reasons Your Mom Would Never Admit

Have you ever fallen for a bad boy? Almost every woman has felt the attraction for a guy who's a little rough around the edges. And that might make you wonder why do good girls like bad guys? “So why do good girls like bad guys? I had this question for a real long time […]

Read More
Why Do Guys Ghost - 17 Reasons - And How To Stop It From Happening! 

When a guy disappears on you it's one of the most annoying things that can happen when dating. Especially if you started liking him and thought “This one might be different!” And now all you can wonder is - Why do guys ghost? You know the situation: You've been talking to him for a while. […]

Read More
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram