Wouldn't it be great if you could buy all of the love, attraction, and commitment you desired in a bottle or take a pill and everything would be EXACTLY how you want it to be?
This seems to be the way of the world, too many superficial lures and not enough heart and soul.
There is no fake-tan, pair of heels, outfit, or pill that will bring real love to you… actually, have you noticed it’s often the night when you've made little effort that great things tend to happen because you’re not trying so hard?
It seems that this is what so many of us want, the easy way to get what we want.
Have you ever thought that maybe there is an easy way that is real, tangible and available for you that doesn't involve spending money on clothes, makeup, alcohol and whatever else you do to feel good?
There are a couple of key things you can do that will greatly influence attraction and can determine whether you and your guy stay in the dating phase or a disconnected relationship, or move into a loving and committed relationship.
I’m going to share one thing that you can do right now to get you started. This one thing will attract your man and have him wanting to be around you more.
This post is all about your ENERGY…it’s that simple!
Your energy is one of the most important factors in attraction.
Whether you’re in a relationship or single and dating, the way you non-verbally communicate is a huge factor in attraction and most of us have little awareness of this.
Next time you see the guy you like – check in on your energy.
What kind of energy are you giving out? Are you in your heart or head, are you communicating and radiating love or fear, are you open or closed?
Start thinking loving thoughts about yourself, about life and about love - I can assure you that if you CONSISTENTLY exude more love you’ll bring more love to you. Practice this with everyone everywhere you go… with men, women, family and friends.
First Up: your general everyday energy
Your energy generally has nothing to do with anyone else but you! No one is responsible for you or your happiness! Maybe you’re generally anxious, stressed, maybe you've had some trauma or hurt in your life and you lack a deeper understanding of your energy and how you come across to your partner and the world in general.
Do you have a; ‘life’s tough’, ‘nothing works out’, ‘I’m not feeling good about myself’ way of being?
I suggest you take regular moments per day in which you check in and shift your operating system to work more effectively with what you want.
Do you talk about what’s doing on in a healthy and constructive way or do you huff and puff, throw around F-you or ugly energy and hope that he will “get you” and change.
If your energy speaks – I’m pissed at you, you've done something wrong, I am not happy with you, then he won’t know how to please you and attraction will dissipate.
Your energy can greatly contribute to why your man distances himself from you and “pulls away”. Women want men to read our minds and to know what is going on with us by the way we relate energetically.
When speaking to him you've also got to be aware of your energy - are you open to learning and growing or are you closed and operate in a “You’re WRONG” mode? Be loving not wronging, even during tough times.
Being loving does not mean you’re a doormat – you’re a woman who healthily communicates her boundaries, needs, desires and concerns (this can be a turn on)...
If you feel insecure or uncertain if this man is really interested in you, or you've got a mental checklist running - you might come across as edgy, hard to please, uncomfortable or even disinterested.
Even though you may be trying to be pleasant and fun, you may still be stressed or anxious or exuding a needy energy without the awareness that you’re doing this (you cannot change what you cannot see).
Periodically throughout a date check in with your energy, body language, tone and facial expressions.
What you can do to change this:
- Walk into every room with a loving and a I trust the process of life vibe (no matter what).
- Arrive at a date believing you’re amazing and knowing that life is here to support you and great love if for you... give the guy kind and accepting vibes. He may not be your match, although there’s no reason you can’t be accepting of who he is.
- When your partner comes home from work greet him with warmth and appreciation – show him your sparkle. In fact, show everyone your sparkle!
- Consciously breathe into your body, your heart and allow yourself to feel connected and gracious.
- Some of you might need some therapy or coaching to assist you.
I suggest you make your energy your number one focus!
People do pick up on your stuff and if you want more and more passion and attraction with a great man, you need to step out of unhelpful patterns and be the women you want to be.
Passive aggressive is punishing and love blocking. Being open and real with your feelings and coming from a place of love with heart energy can move mountains and will build more and more heart, love and intimacy.
Writer, Speaker and Healthy Love Expert