What is his body language telling you?
Today’s question from a reader asks about body language…
And I have an interesting twist on this for you:
QUESTION FROM A READER:
Carlos, I could spend all night reading the forum and I love the emails!
As stated, there is someone I work with and when I am in his office on work related matters
He always, okay not ALWAYS, but a lot of the time sits back in his chair, hands over his head and stretches and then inter-twines his hands behind his head.
Does this mean anything or have I just interrupted his work and he really is just stretching? It happened both times I was in his office today.
We do have a physical attraction and joke around a lot but I don’t date men I work with.
Carlos Cavallo, Dating and Attraction Adviser
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CARLOS CAVALLO ANSWERS:
Awesome! I’m glad to hear that…
It’s juicy stuff, right?
Well, my snarky response to your question might be: If you don’t date guys at work, why are you asking about him? 🙂
Besides, you seem to already know where he’s at, right?
But I get you. You want to know WHAT his body language means.
]Sometimes, it means nothing. In fact, a lot of times, focusing on body language is a huge waste of time.
I always advise women that their gut will always tell when something is off about his body language, and that should be a signal to just keep alert – there’s something up.
Most of the time, being reactive to body language is not the mindset to work in. It’s always thinking from a “react to his signals” mindset, which disempowers you.
In this case, he was probably relaxing. It’s an open stance which shows trust and comfort. It’s not a direct flirtation.
When you come in, he’s open, relaxed and inviting. And he’s probably mentally breaking away from whatever he’s focused on. But not a whole lot else there.
Remember, the only signal you need is – Is he talking to me?
If so, then GAME ON!
Well, with a guy you don’t work with, of course!
Seriously, that’s the only body language you need. Anything else you’re looking for just makes you anxious and puts you up into your head.
Constantly trying to figure out where you stand through body language kills your open and present vibe.
As Obi Wan Kenobi said in “Star Wars”: “Your eyes can deceive you, don’t trust them!”
Oh, and may the Force be with you…
Yours In Perfect Passion…
– Carlos Cavallo