And I'm going to avoid the annoying advice like "be yourself" or "Never give up hope!"
I am here to not only advise you, but also to pick you up, dust you off, and put you back on your feet.
I will try to pump you up a little, but I'm also not going to blow smoke up your skirt, either...
Remember, I'm Carlos "Tough Love" Cavallo.
Jump right into:
Make Him Fall For You - STRATEGY 1: Dial Into His Inner Hero...
A man wants to be your hero - probably more than anything else in the whole wide world.
When little girls are dreaming of having their knight in shining armor come to rescue them, men are dreaming of BEING that knight. ... Your hero.
A guy wants to be a masculine force for you, capable of slaying dragons - or whatever it takes to not only win your heart, but win your RESPECT and admiration.
This is where many women sabotage themselves when it comes to love. Some insecurity or desperation (or even loneliness) makes her lower her standards for a guy. She winds up with an improvement project instead.
Then a certain amount of bitterness creeps in. She knows she deserves more than this...
And she can't summon that respect and admiration she so desires to give him.
The irony is that he's so desperate to earn that from her, that if he just got a little, he'd feed on it like it was mana from heaven...
But when you're caught up in lack, it stifles your ability to appreciate.
Let HIM be your super man!
You have to let him bring that part of him out, no matter how small. He doesn't have to take on a fire-breathing dragon, but he has to have the opportunity to feel like he did.
He wants to protect you, provide for you, and solve your problems. Or at least have a part in that.
Don't pull the feminist slant of "I don't need no man..."
Because when you adopt that attitude, you're not going to GET no man. And even if you did, he wouldn't be one you'd be happy with.
The hero factor is huge!
Ignore it at your own peril...
Get Him Fall Crazy In Love With You - STRATEGY 2: Be Grateful & Accepting...
This is another symptom of settling when you choose a man. It's something that GUYS do just as much as women, by the way.
When you settle for someone just because you feel an emptiness or loneliness in your life that needs filling, you're really vulnerable to choosing a guy that isn't a good fit.
You think he might be "good enough" or a nice project for you, but he winds up being the source of your anger and frustration because he doesn't meet up with your hopes and dreams.
The difference between where he is and where you want/need him to be will become a constant source of discontent. It's where "nagging" comes from in relationships. That feeling that you were entitled to a different kind of guy. The one the fairy tales and stories made you idolize.
But when a woman is grateful for her man - and she accepts him just as he is, she will encounter a whole different kind of man.
He's the one that will smell that spark of appreciation and want it to erupt into a wildfire of connection.
I take this approach with my videos that I post on YouTube. I know full well that what I speak is the Truth. It's not opinion, it's fact.
But if I were to go looking for appreciation and acceptance in the comments, man, would I be in for a world of hurt. 50% is spam, another 25% are whining trolls looking to find someone who will validate their existence. Another 20+% are people who are looking to re-arrange their prejudices.
I dare you to come up with one negative comment about us...
MAYBE 10% or so are appreciative of all the free advice I give...
And that's the story there, folks. I don't shed a single tear over that.
If you read comments on just about ANY YouTube channel, you'll see the exact same thing. If there was a YouTube channel of nothing but kitten pictures to the music of Enya, the haters would be crawling out of the woodwork.
I realized a long time ago it has nothing to do with me, and everything to do with people.
Heck, if I expected anything different, I'd probably have quit this gig years ago. I do this dating and relationship coaching thing because I have unshakeable faith in my message - and the women like you whose lives I change.
You see, I've studied men, women, and relationships for over half my life. There's very little I can't solve when it comes to relationship problems.
However, when you switch your mindset over to acceptance and gratitude, you no longer have any problems!
This week, make it a point to celebrate ONE thing about your man - no matter how small. Tell him about it.
And then watch his back straighten up, his pride bubbles up from within... his face lights up with love.
Make A Man Fall For You - STRATEGY 3: Nurture The F*&% Out of Him...
A man leaves his mom (we hope) at around the age of 18 or so.
Okay, let's say 20 or 25 if he's a "Millennial."
And for the rest of his life he longs for that nurturing again. (If he got healthy nurturing in the first place.)
If he's lucky, he finds a woman who will give a little to him.
Be the loving, nurturing presence he needs.
After all, all he wants is to curl up like a little boy once again in the arms of a female who will nurture him and love him unquestionably.
Is that you?
Many women often start the relationship with nurturing - perhaps a bit too soon. She gets a tentatively positive response from him, but when that evil feeling of entitlement shows up again, it's hard to keep it up.
But you gotta keep him feeling that sense of nurturing, loving presence. It's what he wants in order to fall in love with you - AND because he wants it for his children.
Just strike a balance with your nurturing. Give him that feminine goddess presence, and then give him space to appreciate it when it comes around again.
Men fall in love with the rhythm of love as much as the persistence of it.
How He Falls In Love - STRATEGY 4: REEEE-LAX...
Right now I'm thinking of that Frankie Goes To Hollywood song...
It's the complete opposite of what you'll want to do when a guy inevitably pulls back a bit from your relationship. You'll probably panic just a bit and want to lean back into the relationship.
That's okay, but don't let it become a big stressful deal between you.
That's a man's first warning signal that you're insecure.
And when you show him you're insecure about love, he just knows you're going to open your Bag o' Crazy on him at some point. We don't mind it (we kinda expect it) - but you have to keep your ratio of "Open my bag of crazy" to your "Relaxed!" ratio WAY down.
Like 1 Crazy for every 5 Relax. That's a good start.
So take it easy on yourself - and the relationship. Don't make the relationship your sole sanctuary for your heart. That comes from your lifestyle first.
Yes - you gotta have your life together, woman.
Men believe in women that believe in their own lives.
Make A Man Fall For In Love - STRATEGY 5: Be Irresistible...
I'm going to tell you right up front, I created a love system for women called Irresistible Desire.
I created it because I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that every woman wants the power to captivate her man...
To make him desire her more than almost anything else.
A truly irresistible woman has POWER over men...
The power to make him obsessed with you...
The power to make him live up to his potential...
The power to make a relationship he never doubts or betrays...
The power to make him fall in love with you...
Being irresistible to a man is simple - when you know how men think.
I Want You To Imagine The Man Of Your Dreams.
Picture him in your mind right now.
Round up the "usual suspects"...
Maybe it’s a guy you already know and already have a crush on...
Maybe it's a guy you want to win back into your life.
He’s your dream man, the kind of man you can see yourself with for the rest of your life.
Now, imagine his eyes, the feel of his warm, safe arms wrapped around you, the smell of the skin next to you.
Got that sensation?
Okay, now, here’s the question:
If your dream guy was here in front of you right now, would you know what he needs from you to let himself fall completely in love with you?
If you do, FANTASTIC!
But ... why haven't you gone and gotten that guy yet?
And if you don't know what to do to get him to fall in love with you, let me show you...
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