Dating Advice Guru - Relationship advice

Making Him Earn It

By: Carlos Cavallo
 |

Here’s the deal with men: they’ll have sex with you, whether or not there’s an emotional connection present.

But the one thing I can tell you is that if there wasn’t a connection before you went to bed with him, don’t count on sex to bring you closer.

Sure, he’ll enjoy the physical affection, but having a relationship is simply not a requirement for a guy.

With that in mind, the best way to get him to think about the long-term is by making him work for it first.

A guy needs to feel like he’s earned the privilege to be in that special, intimate place reserved for the worthy ones. This is the invisible “achievement switch” in his head to make him want to stick around after the afterglow.

Fotolia 10742189 Subscription XL 300x189 Making Him Earn It

Otherwise, don’t hold your breath waiting for him to think about committing to you if he didn’t feel like he had to “claw his way to the top” to win your affection.

As a guy, I ask that you simply accept this weird complex of ours.

It’s one of the few puzzling things about us; other than that, we’re pretty much an open book, compared to the enigma of the female psyche.

What can I say - guys have that need to feed their ego. We love a challenge, and it just wouldn’t be the same if you gave it up too soon.

Women that yield too easily are the ones who end up being taken for granted by a guy.

Granted there are some jerks out there just looking to score one chick after another, guys in general just need to be conditioned in a way that will make them really appreciate a woman.

Therefore, if you want to turn that guy into a boyfriend (and promote him to husband later on), it’s up to you to set the pace. Simple as that.

I’ll admit it, men are slaves to their sex drives. Lucky for you, you get to play gatekeeper since you can shut off that desire at will.

That means holding a guy off until he’s shown substantial evidence that he’s the type that will meet you halfway.

But how do you keep him chasing after you while keeping him in check?

Remember, there’s nothing more frustrating for a guy than getting all hot and heavy, then suddenly have his girl back out at the last second. He’ll be left wondering what just happened.

To avoid a messy scenario like that, don’t allow yourself to be in a situation where one thing could lead to another if you aren’t ready yet.

That means no late-night invitations to come up to your place for a warm beverage or to watch a movie.

It also means keeping it easy on the sexual jokes because he might think you’re ready. Let a little innuendo slip through, but switch topics immediately.

That’s not to say you can’t kiss him, hold his hand or any of that sweet stuff. Just make sure you’re somewhere “safe”, like at a public place.

Banner 2 240x400 180x300 Making Him Earn It

Then in the meantime, keep being a great gal to be around and enjoy his company.

This will send a signal to him that he’s still on probation, but with the possibility of getting promoted if the conditions are right.

If he’s a decent guy, he’s going to hang on for the ride because he knows you’re well worth his while.

If not, then at least you’ve figured out who he is before going any further with him. And that’s all there is to it.

Women often have a hard time connecting with a guy and getting him to commit, but the solution isn’t as complicated as they think.

The key is knowing a man’s specific Connection Style.

Mastering this simple concept is as easy as going here, and it’s all smooth sailing with your man after that.

Yours, in Perfect Passion,

- Carlos Cavallo

Is He Seeing Someone Else? 19 Signs You Need To Know

Have you ever found some evidence - a text or a note or something - and thought - Is he seeing someone else? You might wonder if you're just being paranoid or "overthinking" things.  But you can't deny, the evidence is there. This situation is related to an email I got recently from someone: ______________________ […]

Read More
When You're Texting A Guy And He Stops Replying - Ghosted

Nothing is more frustrating - and more common, it seems - than the experience of texting a guy and he stops replying to you. You get GHOSTED. It sounds like some kind of supernatural disease - GHOSTING... but it's one of the most common dating experiences these days. In fact, it's become pretty common for […]

Read More
How To Make Him Regret Leaving You - Or Losing You! (Or Dumping You!)

Breakups are heart-wrenching - and most women would love to know how to make him regret leaving you - or just make him regret dumping you in the first place. And sometimes you just want him to know what he's missing out on. How stupid he was for letting go of you... Yeah, it may […]

Read More
When A Guy Ignores You After An Argument - What To Do!

Have you ever had a guy stop talking to you after you get into a disagreement? What do you do when a guy ignores you after an argument? There's nothing more frustrating than getting the silent treatment.  You feel ignored, minimized, and very small. It also feels like you're abandoned. I'm pretty sure each of […]

Read More
"I Miss My Ex Boyfriend - And I Want Him Back!" What To Do - 17 Tips...

It's probably every woman's worst fear: the breakup. And then you find yourself texting your friends: "I Miss My Ex Boyfriend - And I Want Him Back!" Everything probably started out fantastic between you. You had great dates, great fun, great bedroom action... And then things started to cool off. He didn't text you as […]

Read More
Are You Giving Up On Love? Read This First...

There's no doubt that Love can be frustrating... For some people, it drives them crazy. Maybe that's you - are you giving up on love? Well don't do it until you read this article! This isn't going to be some empty cheerleading, or some rah-rah speech. Sometimes the one thing we need most when we […]

Read More
21 CRITICAL Questions To Ask A Guy

It can be tricky talking to men when you don't know what to say. You might find yourself stuck in silence wondering what to talk about. The best solution is to have questions to ask a guy that get him interested in you. If you know what questions to ask, you can make him feel […]

Read More
I Can't Stop Thinking About Him! - 3 Reasons He's On Your Mind

Whether you are thinking about your newest crush, or have anxiety about your recent break up and don’t know how to stop thinking about someone, this article is for you! “I can’t stop thinking about him!” – Having a crush on a guy isn’t easy… Have you ever been in a situation where you can’t […]

Read More
Dating An Older Man - 17 Secrets You Should Know

If you're thinking of dating an older man, you probably want to know what to expect. There are a lot of things you need to know in order to date older men. Both positive things - and some challenges you should be aware of. You may have a lot of questions, such as: What is […]

Read More
Dating A Divorced Man? 7 Tips You MUST Know...

Dating a divorced man? Before you get too far in the relationship, there are things you must know. Divorced dating is challenging, there's no doubt about that. But if you have the right information, you can date a guy after divorce and make it work. Dating today is definitely different than it used to be. […]

Read More
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram