TALKING TRASH #4: Taylor Swift's Stalker & Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend

By: Carlos Cavallo
 |

Maybe you've heard, and maybe you haven't... but it appears that Taylor Swift has has a stalker for the last 2 years or so.

His name is Eric Swarbrick - and he's been threatening some pretty horrific things.

Starting with his desire to rape and kill her - and in the same sentence declares himself her "soulmate."

Now that's pretty freaky stuff, I'll admit right up front...

But it gets a bit worse when he starts saying things like:

-- "I have learned to absolutely repress the metaphorical monster in me, but, very soon, I will become completely responsible for myself ... What logical conclusion is there other than death."

-- "I will not hesitate to kill her ... and there's nothing you, your lawyers, or the law will be about to do about it. Remember who I am."

Geez, dude... lighten up.

Plus, his letters have been even more creepy and scary over the last few months.

Now, Taylor Swift has gotten a restraining order against him. The judge commanded Swarbrick to stay away from her property, and stop contacting her immediately.

The big worry here is always whether he would carry out some of the threats he's been giving.

Hopefully he's just a guy who's trying to get a little publicity - but there's always a chance he's not. And Taylor Swift has to be especialy careful being a high profile celebrity that will attract a lot of nuts.

tips advice kinds of men to avoid TALKING TRASH #4: Taylor Swifts Stalker & Questions To Ask Your BoyfriendWhat about you? Have you ever had a guy who wouldn't leave you alone?

I think most women have encountered a guy that wouldn't take no for an answer.

But there are a great number of guys who have played in the weird middle ground between persistence - something that women appreciate if it shows a great passion for her - and the other extreme.

Stalking ain't no joke.

So where does it go too far?

From what I've seen, it goes too far when a woman expresses clearly that there's no interest, but he doesn't back off. If you've made a sincere attempt to express that you're NOT interested, and he won't listen, at the very least you know you've got a guy to be careful with.

Now, most guys are pretty decent at heart. They wouldn't harm anyone.

But every so often you do get a bad one on the bunch, so you have to be careful.

Which brings me to this:

3 Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend

And these questions are good because they screen out the guys that are just outside of your comfort zone.

Because, let's face it, sometimes you get started on a relationship with a guy, and he turns into a whack job later on.

So you want to be able to use some questions that help you figure out his personality as much as you can. You're looking to find out if he has any big control issues, as this is a warning sign of that stalker mindset.

These questions can work to learn more about him, as well as clue you in on whether he does have that obsessive love complex that can turn ugly.

Question #1 To Ask Your Boyfriend: Do you think you've ever chased a woman too much?

This one will cut straight to the chase - very directly.

If he declares that there is NO WAY he'd ever do anything like that- without even pausing to think about it, you should pay attention. Because what you want to see is a moment of reflection, where he really thinks about the question for a few seconds.

signs how to tell your boyfriend is clingy TALKING TRASH #4: Taylor Swifts Stalker & Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend

Because we know that if he has gone way too far in the past, and it's creepy stalker stuff, he'd never actually admit it.

So you have to be more subtle and listen to what they don't say sometimes.

Even better is if he tells you a story about one that almost went too far, and it's something pretty silly like "I called her in the middle of the night" or "I brought her flowers before the date."

The harmless stuff usually means he's learned the lessons of youth and has matured a bit. Because a lot of guys (and girls) do dumb things as kids, only to grow up and out of them.

Question #2 To Ask Your Boyfriend: Have you ever been arrested?

Now, this one you're not just going to launch into a conversation with him, right? Don't throw that in his face and expect him not to be a bit intimidated.
Instead, work it into a conversation later - when he's been warmed up a little.

signs your new man is stalker TALKING TRASH #4: Taylor Swifts Stalker & Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend

It's especially good if you can talk to him about something crazy you did that you didn't get arrested for. Then it seems like a reasonable question.

And then listen for anything that comes after it that doesn't sit well with you. And also listen to the stuff that they DON'T tell you.

Question #3 To Ask Your Boyfriend: What's the most powerful, romantic kind of love?

The purpose of this question is simply to see how he thinks about romance and love relationships.

Most of the guys who end up going over to the extremes have a view that is pretty extreme. They overly romanticize love, and they will have unreasonable expectations of a relationship.

Of course, even these guys won't necessarily turn into mad stalkers.

tips advice questions to ask your boyfriend TALKING TRASH #4: Taylor Swifts Stalker & Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend

But the guys that do leave clues, so be sure to screen them out with a few targeted questions to ask your boyfriend.

You might be surprised at what you hear...

Before we end, let me give you a couple clues to watch out for in a potential stalker's behavior:

4 Signs He's A Potential Stalker

1. He's too intense: When they set their sights on you, they've made a decision that you're the one they want, at least for now. Stalkers hold strong eye contact in a way that can feel overwhelming.

2. They stop by unannounced: Their dropping-by-unannounced behavior is one that makes women the most nervous. You feel confused, slightly flattered. But you also feel nervous because, deep down, your instincts are telling you that this is weirdo behavior.

3. He knows more about you than you told him: These guys make it their mission to get as much information about a person as possible. Stalkers will ask anyone they know or meet for details about you once they’ve become fixated on you.

4. They react from a creepy aggression: If you make them angry, jealous, or threatened, they go into an abandonment mode that can be terrifying.

Watch out for guys that trip up your instincts.

Trust your gut, and always keep an eye out for uneven behavior...

10 BEST Ways To Say I Love You - To MEN!

There are probably as many ways to say I love you as there are people to say it. You might be wondering how to say I love you to someone special. Even more important, you probably don't want to scare that person off when you tell them! One of the most common problems I run […]

Read More
10 Long Distance Relationship Tips - How To Make It Work!

A lot of people believe that long-distance relationships are a really bad idea. In fact, if you know what you're doing with a few long distance relationship tips, you can actually make it work. As a matter of fact, long-distance relationships can work just as well and even better than regular relationships. Whatever "regular" is. […]

Read More
21 Toxic Relationship Signs & How To Fix It

If you're looking for signs of a toxic relationship, you probably suspect you have some unhealthy patterns in your relationship. Or you may want to ensure that your relationship stays healthy. By recognizing the signs of a toxic relationship, you can avoid a lot of the problems that people run into in relationships. Let's face […]

Read More
25 Texts You Should NEVER Send A Guy

When it comes to texting a guy, you need to know what texts you should never send a guy more than anything else. Mistakes in texting will earn you silence - sometimes making him ghost you. Guys interpret what you text him. And if we see any red flags, we get more cautious, more silent, […]

Read More
"Do I Love Him?" 25 Signs You're In Love (And not just infatuated)

Sometimes it’s easy to doubt your feelings. When it comes to your love relationship, you might be wondering: "Do I love him?" Is He The One? Sometimes it happens right at the very start. You meet a guy and you just click. And you think right away, I'm falling in love. Other times, you might […]

Read More
Dating a Man With Kids - What You MUST Know FIRST

It's possible that dating a man with kids is one of the most complicated things to deal with in a relationship. But it can also be one of the most gratifying and amazing accomplishments. There's a lot to be interested in. After all if you don't have kids of your own, you might like the […]

Read More
Is He Pulling Away From You? 10 Tips To Save Your Relationship

Has he stopped texting you right back? Has he stopped calling you? You might be wondering, is he pulling away from you? Maybe he's just pulling back a little bit... He isn't texting as much or calling as much... Or maybe he's pulling back a lot... Maybe he's completely ghosted you... Unfortunately this situation is […]

Read More
He Does These 7 Things If He Wants A Serious Relationship With You

What does a man want? Even more important: Do you know what he wants in a serious relationship with you? Men are truly not that complicated. When it comes to our needs in a relationship, we don't have a whole lot that you need to worry about. But you do have to be sure that […]

Read More
How To Make Him Fall In Love With You Again

There's a good chance you're reading this because you've just gone through a breakup. And the one thing you want to know is how to make him fall in love with you again. The other likely possibility is that you sense he is no longer feeling the same as he once did for you. Maybe […]

Read More
Why Does He Keep Coming Back? When he doesn't even want a relationship?

If you've ever had a relationship that was rocky, and sometimes downright difficult, you may wonder why does he keep coming back? Is he half interested? Is he just using me? What the heck is going on? This can really drive you nuts because you feel like you have a good relationship. It's especially confusing […]

Read More
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram