Top 10 Things Irresistible Women Do To Capture A Man's Heart
By: Carlos Cavallo
Welcome to CARLOS' TOP TEN - Irresistible Things Women Do To Capture A Man's Heart.
How a woman carries herself is essential to her success with men.
This should come as no surprise. Especially if you've been around men for longer than 10 years.
(NOTE: I'm typically writing to women that are over 30 and have been around the block a couple times.)
One of my favorite self-help authors says that success leaves clues. And if you follow those clues, and you look at what behaviors get results, and you DO those things - you'll probably get the same results.
The trick is finding the good examples - finding the women who GET IT when it comes to men.
How irresistible are you?
Well, I'm going to save you some searching today. I'm going to show you the things women do that make them irresistible to men. I'll show you how to capture his heart. I'll show you what men want, and what he doesn't want in a woman...
Some might call this ideal female "Alpha Woman" - but I'd prefer to call her the Irresistible Woman. She's got her act together.
Let's kick it off with:
#10 Kickass Girl Habit: She's done second guessing her value and her character...
These days, the media seems to own our perceptions. All you see are ads, ads, everywhere.
And they do little to make you feel good about yourself. In fact, quite the opposite. They're always trying to get you to feel inadequate, so you'll buy some new cream or pill.
Don't fall for this Trap.
Stop second-guessing who you are. You were born adequate, and you'll only get better the more you stay away from the lure of conspicuous consumer habits... this constant consumption.
If you have something you want to work on, do it. But don't live your life looking at your glass being half-empty.
You're enough right now - and you will keep getting better the less you stare at every imaginary defect.
#9 Kickass Girl Habit: She's happy single, AND open to finding a great guy to make it better...
One of my principles is this:
You're better off single than in the wrong relationship.
You might want to check in with yourself on that. Say it aloud and see if you believe it.
Create your own happiness.
Most people believe it INTELLECTUALLY, but their "scared to be alone" side starts to undermine that reality. Don't fall for that inner voice of fear.
You have to believe this, because it is true. And staying in the wrong relationship is only going to damage your sense of self.
When you really do enjoy your time alone, you'll be surprised how many people - how many men - want to join you.
#8 Kickass Girl Habit: She's genuine - even with her faults...
Trying to hide or cover up or change who you are to suit other people...
Trying to keep your imperfections invisible...
These things will make you a neurotic mess.
You can NEVER feel good about yourself when you're engaged in an active campaign to hide it...
Now, I'm not saying you should broadcast your flaws to everyone. That's just as weird.
But you can't make the focus of your life being your camouflaging your weaknesses. You can't be authentic to others that way, much less yourself.
Draw a line in the sand, and stick by that woman. Don't stop getting better, by all means. Just make YOU genuine and real to everyone you meet. Even strangers.
#7 Kickass Girl Habit: She's a work in progress - and that's okay...
This one falls into the category of being okay with being incomplete.
Commit to being a better YOU.
Every single one of us is imperfect. It's our attitude toward that understanding that sets you apart.
We can all compare ourselves to an imaginary perfection, but that does nothing to make you happy.
Be happy now - AND work on your shortcomings along the way.
#6 Kickass Girl Habit: She can take a walk if that's what she needs to do...
My friend Jackie went to a car dealership a while back. She saw a hot red sports car she'd always wanted. A few years old, but exactly what she desired.
She saw the sticker price of $32,000 and shook her head...
She told the salesman, "I'll give you $21,000. No more."
He said no...
She walked away and went home...
A few hours later she got a call from him: "You come down here with half that in cash and it's yours." (After making up a whole bunch of reasons why he had a sudden change of heart.)
Jackie got her car!
The secret of all good negotiation is one that few people ever learn: You have to be able to walk away.
This is true for a car you want, or with a street vendor, or... any relationship you will ever have.
You gotta be able to walk if it isn't what you want. It's a more important statement of your self-esteem.
AND your inner character sees it, too...
#5 Kickass Girl Habit: She doesn't have to act like a man to get what she wants...
This means that she's not aggressive in life...
Big difference there.
Aggressive is being pushy to the point of annoyance. Whereas ASSERTIVE is keeping your boundaries intact.
Confidence is SEXY.
You have to stand up for yourself. And you don't want to run over other people with YOU.
Because once you move away from mommy and daddy, you're on your own, kid.
And even when you find the relationship you want, you're still on your own. You're two separate people who can try to create a special connection, but you'll always be you - one person in charge of her life.
Unfortunately, the assertive woman is being morphed into something completely wrong these days.
She's being told she needs to act like... a man.
The feminine and masculine are a sacred part of our relationships. And you can't create a loving and fulfilling relationship without knowing how incredibly strong femininity can be.
#4 Kickass Girl Habit: She won't be a victim...
If there's one thing that will hold you back in every part of your life, it's playing the role of the victim.
Sometimes that's by failing to assert yourself. Sometimes that's when you point the finger of blame at everyone else but the person who is really in control of your life - which is YOU.
We often self-victimize more than anything else.
Stop re-living that imaginary negative life you have running around in your head - like film footage of a future you don't want.
YOU control your feelings and emotions, contrary to what the gurus out there say. Moods may come and go, but you choose your reaction to life. It's not automatic.
That's part of your incredible power as a woman...
#3 Kickass Girl Habit: She's stopped acting like a 20-something...
Do you act your age?
Look, as a man, I can tell you that acting like you stopped maturing at the age of 22 is NOT attractive. You have to offer up more to keep a man's interest these days.
You've got Japanese sex robots, Internet addictions, video games, etc. (No, I'm not kidding about the Japanese sex robots, by the way. I wish I were.)
A man wants a woman, but she's gotta level-up...
No more celebrity worship: Yes, we notice if you have a stack of In Style and People magazines on the coffee table. It screams "superficial!" and doesn't entice a man into your world. You're welcome to have your guilty pleasures, of course - but keep them under control...
No more drama: This is pretty big with guys. We are perfectly fine accepting a small amount of it, because we know it comes with the territory. But if you're walking around looking for emotional turmoil, we sense it. And we will put the relationship in the "temporary" category.
#2 Kickass Girl Habit: She nurtures her mind, body, and spirit...
And NO, not in one of those feel-good-book-into-movie products you see on the bookstore shelves. (It's marketing more than it is enriching fiction...)
No woo-woo nonsense here.
The best investment you'll ever make...
A woman's mind is something she invests in, as well as her body and health...
A man looks at a woman and sees past the makeup, the fake boobies, the agonizing high-heels and fashion statements...
He looks to see if he can see a living, thinking, growing person in there. Not just someone that's gussied up to draw his eye.
(BTW: There will always be men who choose only the superficial aspects of women, but they're really not your concern, are they? That's not the guy you want, so don't mourn his lack of interest.)
If you're willing to spend a few dollars on a good book full of insight and learning, you'll win us over without hesitation...
If you take a class or a retreat that teaches you good meditation principles...
If you take a self-growth class that puts you on the path to a feeling of acceptance and self-love...
If you invest money in yourself...
We will notice.
And hopefully, so will you.
#1 Kickass Girl Habit: She's got a plan and a direction...
Where are you headed?
When you realize that YOU are your most vital asset - your most valuable possession - you'll realize that skating by on free articles from Cosmo or the Internet are never going to get you where you want to be in life. Nor will they get you the man and the relationship you desire.
You'll start to invest more energy in yourself...
There are THREE reasons for this:
Free stuff is, well... free stuff. And it only gets you so far...
When you invest money in your growth, you'll feel more obligated to your growth. It's a fact that we're more likely to value something we've paid for than something that was just handed to us...
When you take ACTION to work on yourself, you'll immediately feel better about yourself...
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