Chemistry In A Relationship - Do you have it? Find out…

By: Carlos Cavallo

Chemistry is one of those things that almost seems mystical. And if you don't know what you're looking for, you might not know if you have chemistry in relationship.

Everybody talks about chemistry. And it is really important.

how do I know if we have chemistry in relationship Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

All the pieces fit - just right...

If you don't have chemistry in your relationship, chances are your passion will just flicker and die out. You need that special spark between you two keep the flame alive.

It's a bit of an overused metaphor, but it's really true. Without passion, your relationship will feel like buddies or friends, not lovers.

What IS Chemistry?

First, let's talk about what chemistry is. Because the more it's a mystery to you, the more likely you're going to make a mistake.

The simplest definition of chemistry is that it’s physical attraction to another person. It's a definite sexual connection that happens early in the relationship.

There are two different kinds of chemistry: REAL and temporary.

REAL chemistry is the kind of chemistry where you have a genuine click between you. It's when you feel a certain special something that you can't put into words. And even though this means you have a connection, it doesn't mean you're soulmates or you are meant to be together.

In fact, a lot of the time this chemistry can cover up a lot of severe incompatibilities between you.

But REAL chemistry lasts! It won't fade away (at least not for quite some time.) And it's a very necessary part of your long term relationship.

The other kind of chemistry is temporary. This is where you may have been under the influence, or one or both of you was emotionally compromised. The end result being that you wind up in bed or intimate with each other, and then later on down the road you discover it was just a momentary thing between you. Not real.

This kind of chemistry is only a problem if you try to build a relationship on top of it. This Foundation won't hold up unless you find stronger stuff for the base.

The Dangers of Having TOO MUCH Chemistry

Look, let's be real. Sometimes chemistry pushes you into a decision you didn't mean to make. If you've ever had a one-night stand, you know what I mean.

24 Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

This can be just as lethal as the temporary kind of chemistry where you are under the influence. You can be under the influence of a passionate connection.

But again, it doesn't mean that your relationship is going to stand the test of time. Sometimes the chemistry can cover up a lot of broken parts.

Another piece of the puzzle is that you need to have emotional chemistry. This is the kind of chemistry that makes you attracted to him not just for the physical part, but for the real spiritual connection between you.

Do you have chemistry in your relationship?

There are definite signs you can look for that tell you if you have chemistry. I will outline them for you here, and you can see if your relationship has any of them.

Just keep in mind that - just because you have a sign of chemistry - this doesn't mean that your relationship is guaranteed to succeed. Or that you should force it to succeed.

Not every relationship should survive. It can be difficult to deal with if you don't know how to handle the emotional hurt of a breakup.

But clinging to a relationship that isn't meant to be is a far worse mistake.

As you might be aware, chemistry is not the same thing as compatibility.

Let's talk about some love and chemistry tips that will help you understand this better:

Love & Chemistry Tip #1: Love Is Not Chemistry

And chemistry is not love.

Getting these two confused is a source of problems for many people. Love is a connection that forges between two people over time.

is having chemistry and being in love the same Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

Having good chemistry doesn't mean it's love...

Chemistry is something you feel pretty quickly. The problem arises when we mistake chemistry as love.

I will talk more about this in a bit.

Love & Chemistry Tip #2: Chemistry Is Sometimes Lust

I have to put this out there. Sometimes physical chemistry is just a great excuse to get physical with someone. It can be hard to resist.

But if you have physical chemistry, you also need to cultivate a certain amount of self-control and self-discipline. Because if you start with physical chemistry, you can very easily turn that into a relationship if you find that you're compatible.

I've had plenty of experiences with physical chemistry turning into very temporary relationships. Mostly because I didn't show more restraint at jumping into bed with her.

Which is why YOU must be careful about your moving too quickly!

Love & Chemistry Tip #3: Chemistry is Sometimes CO-DEPENDENCE

Codependency is a bad word in psychological circles. It's not used as much anymore, because people tend toward other terms for it.

But it's still valid.

Codependency is when a person relies on the emotional connection to their partner or the relationship in an unhealthy way.

They feel as if they can't survive without their partner and draw most of their self-worth and self-esteem from that person or the relationship.

Sometimes these relationships can go really bad.

But the important thing to understand is whether or not you're in an unhealthy relationship with a man. If you feel like you can't break free from the relationship, or you have psychological connections that you can't break on your own, you probably should seek some outside professional help.

Love & Chemistry Tip #4: Chemistry is Sometimes Just Your Shared Purpose

what are the signs we have good chemistry in relationship Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

Friends can have great chemistry, too.

There are plenty of examples where people have met and connected because of their shared circumstance.

  • Maybe they were both in rehab, or recovery.
  • Sometimes you work closely together and mistake this for chemistry. The passion you share on a project might imitate a romantic connection.
  • Some people meet at a Tony Robbins seminar, or some other kind of self-help conference and feel a thin connection because of this.

That's why it's important to look at the circumstances around how you met him and make sure they weren't extraordinary.

Love & Chemistry Tip #5:  Beware of "Destiny" As Chemistry

It's a common misunderstanding that when we feel a strong connection to someone that it must mean a spiritual connection is there.

You might think that you have a connection in a past life, or there is some kind of new age explanation for this feeling you have.

While this is certainly possible, the more likely explanation is something more realistic. What you have to watch out for is how quickly you look to a mystical explanation as opposed to a real life explanation.

Don't attribute any “ feeling” you might have for a guy immediately as being a sign that you are meant to be. Whether this is a feeling you are “soulmates” or “twin flames” or whatever.

Love & Chemistry Tip #6: Chemistry is sometimes a combination of ingredients

Just like any good recipe, The Love Potion you think of as chemistry has a lot of different ingredients in it.

signs boyfriend and I have no chemistry Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

The right mix can create amazing chemistry...

Here are just a few:

  • Similarity:  It's a widely known fact that people feel a connection to people that seem similar to them.  Sometimes this can be misunderstood as being a kind of spiritual connection. Just remember that just because he seems similar to you in many ways, this doesn't mean he will be a good fit for a relationship.
  • Familiarity: Very often this feeling that a guy seems so “familiar” to you can be misunderstood as being a kind of spiritual connection because of the weird “deja vu” sensation you feel around him. Don’t be blinded by notions of “mystical romance.”
  • Contrary: Sometimes you mistake a man who is so different from your last boyfriend as being a special connection or chemistry. In reality, you may have had a really bad relationship with someone, and you find yourself seeking the opposite in a guy.  If you've ever heard yourself say ”He's nothing like (ex boyfriend)! It feels so good!” you may be making a mistake about this.
  • Mysterious:  We are all attracted to mystery. The unknown. Maybe it's because you had so many other guys who unloaded their life story in the first two hours of your first date. But when you meet a guy who seems quietly confident because he doesn't talk about his past, you might find yourself intrigued. You might find his mysteriousness feels like chemistry.
  • Earnest & Sincere: Our primitive brains are always checking to make sure that the person we're talking to seems truthful. Honest. And the more sincere and eager he seems, the more you will interpret this to mean something special. So watch for his sincerity!
  • Scents: A little unknown fact is that odors actually indicate certain kinds of compatibility. And yes, how someone smells can trigger that feeling of chemistry between you! (After all, that's how most women choose the perfumes they wear.) There's a lot of complicated biology here, but you may find a lot of subconscious decisions are made about who you feel chemistry with.
  • Humor: One of the most consistent indicators of Attraction is how much a woman finds a guy funny. If he makes you laugh, you will probably feel a strong chemistry with him. (But also stay alert! Keep in mind that this is one of the easiest ways for a guy to fool you!)

Love & Chemistry Tip #7: Stay grounded

The more you seem confident and relaxed - AND the more he seems confident - the more likely you will find each other attractive.

And yes, you'll also feel undeniable chemistry with each other. This is because confidence and security in ourselves transmits energy.

02 Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

One of the best thing you can do is to keep yourself relaxed and calm with any guy you meet. The connection will feel more real and the chemistry will follow.

Love & Chemistry Tip #8: Curiosity is Contagious

The number one enemy of chemistry is fear. And the opposite of fear is curiosity.

Think about it: If you're curious and seeking understanding, you can't be afraid. And that's the best attitude you can bring to any relationship!

A couple things you can do:

  • Share your own stories that match his stories.
  • Ask questions that bring out details of him and his life

Stay curious about him. And stay curious about your relationship. The more we discover about each other, the more chemistry we create.

Love & Chemistry Tip #9: Understand Body Language

do we have chemistry is he attracted to me Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

Do you know how to read a man's signals...?

One of the most powerful tools for creating chemistry is understanding and using body language to your benefit.

  • Do you know the signals that men give off that say he's interested?
  • Do you know how to mirror him to bring out attraction?
  • Do you know what men are looking for in your body language?

It's vitally important to understand how to use your posture, your eyes, and every part of you to generate chemistry with him. We lost touch with our bodies and understanding how to use them this way.

Body language signals work on a subconscious frequency with men. That's why it's one of the most important methods.

Love & Chemistry Tip #10: Chemistry is Compounding!

The reality is that chemistry is created by multiple factors coming together. It's rarely just one thing.

When you can stack body language with curiosity with some of the other factors I've talked about in these tips, you can create undeniable attraction with almost any man.

The more of these tips you use, the better your connection and chemistry will be. And the romance will just flow naturally.

Here are the signs you have chemistry in your relationship...

Chemistry Sign #1: There were Sparks right off the bat

This is probably the most obvious one. When you meet a guy and you feel that click right off the bat - almost instantly.

dating relationship advice how do I know if chemistry is good Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

Fireworks? Or chemistry?

In fact, it's almost hard to keep your hands off him.

And this is where the problem usually starts. Because you have such a strong physical connection, you're more likely to dive into a relationship with this guy than just leaving it as a hook up. Or a short-term Romance.

There's nothing wrong with either of them.

Until you try and forge a relationship out of something that doesn't have the potential. That's when you find out there's nothing there.

And you can’t build a lasting love from a casual spark.

However, this next sign might confuse you:

Sign #2: Maybe there weren’t sparks right off the bat...

Sometimes the chemistry doesn't show up on that all-important first date. It can happen.

But if you were fortunate enough to decide to go for a second date, just to give it another try - or maybe you were desperate, hey -  you might have found that you did have some physical attraction.

Sometimes the chemistry doesn't show up instantaneously. That's okay.

That's why I always advise women to give a guy at least a second chance.

(But if the chemistry doesn't show up on that second date, it's probably not going to show up on the 3rd. So let it die out right there.)

Sign #3: The compatibility shows up too…

Sometimes you get lucky and hit it out of the park: You feel not only that ZING When you're with him but you also feel that you two have a lot in common.

This is an excellent sign and it's one that you should focus on.

Again, this doesn't mean that your relationship is destined for heaven or even marriage. But it gives you two of the most important building blocks of a relationship: Attraction and compatibility.

Sign #4: In the Body…

As I mentioned earlier, body language is essential for creating chemistry.

If you see signs of Attraction from his body language, pay attention. Men broadcast their interest in you in many different ways. His body language will be the easiest one for you to spot.

Sign #5: You Both Like Seinfeld

Okay, maybe you don't both like just Seinfeld, but if you share the same favorite comedians, that's a big sign.

09 Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

When we share a sense of humor, we immediately share a very basic level of connection and chemistry. It's one of the best signs that this person is a good fit for you.

So if you like the same comedy movies, comedians, cartoons - whatever, this is a good sign that you have chemistry.

Sign #6: You find it easy to be honest…

One of the important signs of chemistry is that communication just seems to flow. You'll probably find it easy to talk about things that are slightly embarrassing with him.

What this means is that you don't fear this connection or a loss of affection by being vulnerable. Which is essential for your future communication.

If you find yourself revealing stuff from your past with him, and it's not due to alcohol consumption, there's a good chance your chemistry is solid.

And this sign also speaks to your compatibility.

Sign #7: You just can’t keep your hands to yourself…

Yeah, sometimes the sexual chemistry just manages to override everything. You can't keep your hands off each other, and any chance you get you are jumping in bed.

You know this kind of wild monkey love, don't you?

Now, of course this particular sign of chemistry is one of the ones we don't want to question. Because it feels so good, you just want to enjoy it.

signs boyfriend and I have chemistry in relationship Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…

Don't confuse sex with chemistry.

But you have to be careful because it can also be one of the most misleading when it comes to starting a real relationship. If the physical part of your romance overshadows the rest - especially if it's too early - you can very easily derail the train of Love.

There's a balance you have to strike when you start dating a guy you have a strong chemistry with.

And it's even more important - because you know how hard it is to find a guy you have that kind of physical connection with!

  • How do you avoid the mistakes so you don't ruin the chemistry between you?
  • How do make sure the spark of desire doesn't fade out?
  • How do make sure you don't wind up just a "friends with benefits"? Where he just calls you at 2:00 AM to "come hang out..."?

Let's face it:

Most women do not get the kind of success they deserve with men.

To put it bluntly, most women don't do very well with men. Even when she gets a boyfriend, all you see is how deeply disconnected the two of them are. (I'm sure you've sensed this around a lot of couples. I know I have...)

You want a REAL relationship. A heartfelt connection with a man that you can TRUST in!

To do this, you gotta have a powerful CONNECTION with him.

UN-breakable Connection!

There's a simple trick to getting him to feel like you're the One for him - just based on the power of your connection to him.

Where you never have to worry about him getting bored of you (or the relationship...)

You'll never have to fear him falling for another woman...

I just put the finishing touches on a video presentation that explains this Secret To Connection to you...

Go watch it now!

dos donts how to be a mysterious woman attract men Chemistry In A Relationship   Do you have it? Find out…


Chemistry In A Relationship - Do you have it? Find out…

Chemistry is one of those things that almost seems mystical. And if you don't know what you're looking for, you might not know if you have chemistry in relationship. Everybody talks about chemistry. And it is really important. If you don't have chemistry in your relationship, chances are your passion will just flicker and die […]

Read More
Communication In A Relationship - 9 Tips To Reach Your Man

Any woman who has been in a relationship knows that communication is one of the most important things. In fact, if you don't have communication in a relationship, you don't really have a relationship. But how do you communicate with guys? Men can seem so difficult to talk to. The funny thing is, to men, […]

Read More
How To Be Mysterious - And Make Any Man Desire You

If you ever watched a movie where a woman seduced a man, you may have wondered how to be mysterious like that. How do you make yourself attractive and alluring by being mysterious? Unfortunately, most women don't learn the ancient art of how to use their Feminine Mystique anymore. It's very rare that girls are […]

Read More
Questions To Ask A Guy Over Text

If you've ever found yourself wanting to flirt or just reconnect with a guy, you probably wish you knew some questions to ask a guy over text. This article is going to be different, though. Instead of giving you a bunch of careless questions, I'm going to give you the kinds of questions you MUST […]

Read More
What To Do When He Is Pulling Away From You - 7 Tips

Nothing sends a chill down your spine faster than knowing that your man is growing cold and distant. And when you feel that happening, you need to know what to do when he is pulling away from you. Distance is the one thing that panics men and women. The problem with guys is that they […]

Read More
What To Talk About With A Guy - 18 Tips

Have you ever been talking with a man and found yourself wondering what to say next? You wonder what to talk about with a guy… I'll be the first person to tell you that talking to a man is really not that difficult. The problem is that you only learned how to talk to other […]

Read More
Are You Dating A Married Man? The 26 Rules - And How To NOT Get Hurt

Most women never set out to date a married guy. But for some reason this guy was so appealing and so interesting, and now you find yourself dating a married man. He could be a guy you work with, a guy you met at a party, or really anywhere. Maybe you started talking and realized […]

Read More
How To Make Him Jealous - And Love You More! - 12 Secrets

One of the most common problems a woman has is when a guy seems to be losing interest. And you know that one of the best ways to get him interested again it's figuring out how to make him jealous - and how to make him love you again. It always seems like he's got […]

Read More
Why Do Good Girls Like Bad Guys? 9 Reasons Your Mom Would Never Admit

Have you ever fallen for a bad boy? Almost every woman has felt the attraction for a guy who's a little rough around the edges. And that might make you wonder why do good girls like bad guys? “So why do good girls like bad guys? I had this question for a real long time […]

Read More
Why Do Guys Ghost - 17 Reasons - And How To Stop It From Happening! 

When a guy disappears on you it's one of the most annoying things that can happen when dating. Especially if you started liking him and thought “This one might be different!” And now all you can wonder is - Why do guys ghost? You know the situation: You've been talking to him for a while. […]

Read More
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram