Sure, a man does need to feel that chemistry with you, but he also needs to feel something more powerful in his COREto really fall in love.
Sexual attraction is what a guy feels when he finds your appearance sexually appealing. This is what guys mean when they say you're "hot."
Guys are pre-programmed to see certain parts of a woman.
He looks at her boobs because that tells him if she could nourish a baby - and that she's of the right age...
He looks at her hips and butt because that tells him if she could bear children without a risk to her health - and again, if she's of age...
He looks at her hair to see if she's healthy (the sheen of your hair is a strong indicator of your health)
There are a ton more indicators like this - visual indications - and he looks at all of them to see if you would be a great prospect as a "mom."
Betcha didn't know this was going on behind the scenes, right?
Okay now -
Mind and spirit...
Spiritual attraction is what a guy feels when he feels like you might be "The One" for him. He feels like you could be his soulmate.
Now before you go bonkers thinking that guys don't think this way - think again!
Men are actually MORE likely to consider a woman a potential soulmate than she would. He's quicker to assume a certain woman is "The One" for him. Women take a lot more time to make this decision.
He's looking at a lot of subtle other indications that you are going to meet some of the psychological qualities he needs. Like loyalty, resilience, and stability.
He needs to know you've got good character - and that you will still be able to nurture HIM at the end of the day, after he's done hunting mammoths.
Well, okay- guys don't have to do THAT anymore, but you see where the behavior got started.
Okay, now it's on to my -
7 Tips for How To Attract Men - with little to NO effort...
How To Attract Men - Tip #1: Be as Girly As You Can...
I have a feeling this will be one of the most controversial tips I can offer you. But it's also the most TRUE.
The more manly a man is, the more he's attracted to what we think of as "Feminine" traits. The more testosterone he's got going on his system, the more he's going to look for a girly girl to counter it and compliment it.
You may have even noticed this in the real world, in the opposite way. If a guy is a bit on the "soft" and dainty side, he tends to fall towards a woman that most matches his opposite. So he winds up with a woman who is more dominating, more controlling, and less feminine.
Fortunately, this is only a small percentage of the population. But if you were to compare today to 30 years ago, the difference in men's (and women's) behavior would probably startle you.
How do you make your femininity work for you...?
Let me say this another way, and I'll be more direct:
Men are attracted to FEMININE women. NOT manly women.
I'm hoping this is not a shock to you. I typically advise women who are in their 30s and later - not the younger women. But it still amazes me when I coach a woman where she thinks that it's going to help her to act and dress like a man. Usually, this is a result of her mom failing to give her good information.
What are some of these "feminine" traits?
Well, hang on. If there's a part of this article that will activate you, it's going to be this list:
Feminine trait 1: Cute and shy.
Yup, we like women who are demure and soft. Gentle. Compassionate.
Not loud, hard, or aggressive.
And no, this has NOTHING to do with whether or not he can "take a strong woman" or not. A woman's strength is not the same as a man's "strength."
In fact we often mistake the "obnoxious" things that guys do as being "assertive."
The things that make a person self-actualized and strong in a healthy way is something you see in how compassionate and resilient they are everyday.
Feminine trait 2: Needs our help. Occasionally...
Guys need to serve a purpose in your life. He can't just be someone you get together to talk and hang out with. Men need to DO their way into your heart.
And if you're being completely truthful with yourself, you'd also admit that men are at their most attractive when they're at work on their goals and building their empire.
Guys feel more emotionally connected to women who can be vulnerable and open in their need for men.
Because in the end, guys need women. We need your perspective, your female strengths. And we need to know you need us for the masculine things.
Feminine trait 3: Lets HIM lead...
One of the things that drew me to my wife was her understanding that I was strong and smart enough to captain our relationSHIP. I had the emotional intelligence as well as the wisdom to take charge of our family and make it work.
She's been exceptional in trusting my lead again and again.
EXAMPLE: When our family relocated from the San Francisco Bay Area up to Oregon, I flew up to do the house hunting. After a few days of hunting, I found us a great property and house. And did the work to make the offer and start the purchase of the house.
And she went along with my decision ... sight unseen!
Give him the ability to show you what he can do...
That's right. She trusted me to find the best home I could in the area. (I'll tell you that when we first drove up in the truck to the house, I was definitely feeling nervous. Talk about a scary moment!)
Now, I'm not saying that every couple could do that, but you have to ask yourself - where you would have to draw that line? How far could you trust him to do the right thing?
That's a question you need to ask right up front as you're getting to know him, too. Don't wait on that until he gets down on one knee and proposes to you, because character in a man is not something that appears out of nowhere.
How To Attract Men In A Way He Can't Resist - Tip #2: Level Up, Baby...
There's a lot of fluffy spiritual talk these days about "being yourself." About "being authentic" and "speaking your truth."
But I've yet to hear anyone tell you what to do when you think that "being yourself" isn't working.
What if "yourself" isn't what this guy seems to be interested in?
Well, the truth is that YOU are.
What's happening is that you're not really "being yourself." Most people think they're being authentic and genuine - but the truth is that they are still acting from old wounds. They haven't resolved any of their automatic emotional hot buttons. So they're frequentlytriggered instead of acting from a healthy, balanced place.
Again, when I started dating the woman that became my wife, I made it clear that it was about growth in our relationship. If that growth meant that she had to move on, I was prepared for that. (Some of you might know that this is what they really mean by "If you love someone, set them free...")
And that's what convinced her to stick around and commit to this partnership.
Better mother, better partner, better YOU!
To heck with being yourself - do it one better: Evolve into the BEST version of you.
Don't sell yourself short in believing that you're done growing because you got your high school degree - or college degree...
Or that you're "done" because you made it past 30... or 40... or whatever age...
You're never really "done."
And if you want to attract a high quality man in this day and age, you need to level up - just like in a video game.
Have you ever gone to a gathering of other women - or people in general - and just felt like you were in a higher class of people? Not that they were superior in any way, but that they were focused on their own growth?
Maybe they were less anxious...
Or they were more read and better educated...
Or they were smarter with their money...
Or they had some smart ideas about raising kids compassionately and mindfully...
And they were on a path of self-development...
Maybe you felt a little envious at where they were. That isn't a reason to shoot them down or belittle them. These "high value" people are the ones to look to for your own growth.
And they also show you the qualities to work on.
And you know what?
Most of them would be happy to guide you and help you. That's the difference between the thinking of people at the top compared to those who only want to make excuses for why they are "stuck" at the bottom.
The fact is that there ARE high quality women that will immediately get the attention of every man around. He can smell this on you like an expensive perfume.
You will change.
The question is, do you choose the direction, or just let it happen to you?
How To Attract Men In A Way He Can't Resist - Tip #3: Use What You HAVE...
I see a lot of women who are also stuck in a negative mindset. They don't see themselves as having the ability to attract men simply because they think they're already lacking a quality.
They perceive themselves to be "Less than." Meaning, they see themselves as fundamentally lacking in some way. They're just not "enough."
That's a tired old voice in you that is trying to keep you struggling.
Isn't it time to finally shut that voice down?
The reality is that you already have EVERYTHING you need to attract a great guy. What you might lack is the understanding of WHAT you should be using to get him!
Here is a short list of assets that you have:
Intelligence - You don't need to be a genius to get a guy, just reasonably able to learn a few new tricks...
A smile - don't underestimate how much this can help you...
Carlos' advice - I'm only being a tiny bit funny here. If you follow what I teach, you WILL do better with men than a woman who doesn't know this stuff. It's a fact.
A desire for more - which you must have if you've read this far...
You have far more in assets than you probably realize - so start putting that to use and you'll discover a hidden power that most women will never find...
"Just be yourself" is the most repeated advice out there. No one knows what that means, really.
But when it comes to using your abilities and uniqueness, that's something you can put to work right now.
How To Attract Men In A Way He Can't Resist - Tip #4: Get Chilled...
You might not realize men are attracted to this, but it's probably one of the most under-valued things a woman can show a man.
In fact, it's hiding in plain view!
What is it?
It's your cool, calm, chilled out vibe...
It's the relaxed version of you that most people call "Confidence."
Be the person YOU would want to be around.
You see, confidence isn't what you think it is. Most people think of confidence as this mysterious state of mind where you're not afraid of anything, and no one rattles your cage.
NEWSFLASH: Only sociopaths and reckless fools don't feel a bit of fear at doing the things YOU feel afraid of. You're supposed to feel a bit afraid of new situations and different things.
The difference between a confident person and a NOT confident person is that the confident person felt afraid and did it anyway.
You assume they didn't feel afraid, but they did. They just worked on not letting their fear STOP THEM.
Ever notice how the people we call "confident" just seem to be pretty cool and relaxed? It's not that they're pulling a sword out and yelling "Charge!" all the time.
They're simply being relaxed in themselves. They don't have a jittery, anxious aura about them.
What makes a person look low-confidence is having a constant aura of "Am I okay? Am I doing okay?" It's their ego needing strokes, not just being right here in this moment.
So just go to work on the calmer, chilled version of you...
How To Attract Men In A Way He Can't Resist - Tip #5: Maximize the Wow...
What every woman should do is to take some time to find clothes that not only flatter but COMPLEMENT her body style and image.
You may think because you were born a woman that you know how to dress, how to do your makeup right, and how to make yourself look like a drop-dead-sexy specimen of femininity. And you may be able to!
But let me also tell you that I see women every day - about 75% or more, to be honest - that don't know how to look good. They're doing the "fast fashion" thing, with cheap clothes that they only intend to wear maybe once or twice.
Don't be that woman. Take the time, energy, and money to make yourself look like the spectacular prize you are.
Those other women who can't seem to pull it off usually wind up looking a lot worse than if they'd just worn jeans and a t-shirt. I wish that was exaggeration. It's not.
Get a really classy haircut...
Buy some clothes that flatter you...
Make sure the colors you're using are working...
Maximize the "WOW" a guy feels when he sees you. It's the best thing you can do.
And before you dismiss this tip as though "you got it" - check in with someone who'll tell you the truth. You might be able to double your WOW just by letting a new set of eyes set you straight.
How To Attract Men In A Way He Can't Resist - Tip #6: F Like Your Life Depends On it...
And by F - I mean FLIRT!
You can make up for a LOT of mistakes, a lot of bad hair, a lot of awkwardness, and a LOT of "not being a supermodel" just by doing one thing that most women don't know how to do...
It's a 5 letter word, but most women treat it like a four-letter-word.
Why do so many women have a problem with flirting? I believe it's because women are much more socially sensitive. They don't want to stand out or appear like a rebel.
Flirting takes courage. And willingness to stand out and be seen.
Show him your interested...
And to be fair, most women wait for men to show interest. She thinks that the subtle eyelash batting she gave is enough to tell him she's interested and wants him to talk to her.
And guess what?
It's really unlikely he will pick up on anything that subtle.
You gotta put yourself in his path, and get SEEN. Knowing how to flirt effectively with a guy is the key to him getting a good look at you.
How To Attract Men In A Way He Can't Resist - Tip #7: Stop With The "Tricks" Already...
If there's one thing our world seems to thrive on, it's quick "tricks" to get "fast" results.
What ifthe thing you wanted most (him) took more time?
What if it wasn't something that happened in 15 seconds?
One of the most frustrating things is when I get an email from a new client that bought a program and she suddenly proclaims that "I didn't get a magic pill!"
She's had the materials for (literally) 10 minutes, and he isn't breaking her door in to propose to her. And then I get an email that "it's not working!!!"
This may sound like an exaggeration, but it's EXACTLY what I see in a lot of my clients.
Invest a little time to gain the knowledge you need...
They're so impatient to get a man to respond - and it's usually the ex that just broke up with them. She MUST get him back right now!!
(If she'd been doing what I taught, she wouldn't be in this situation now. If she had simply got my program, he'd be bonded to her tighter than Krazy glue!)
What if learning how to attract men simply took a couple days?
Would that be so awful?
No, it wouldn't. Especially when you consider that whatever you are doing right now is probably not working.
So why not do something realistic? Something that gets you RESULTS?
Stop trying to rush to quell your inner panic...
Drop your chase for the "magic bullet" and instead use some PROVEN strategies that WORK.
I've been teaching these tips and tricks for over 17 years now! I know what I'm doing.
Trust the Carlos...
And trust yourself! No one is going to just come along and magically guide you to this knowledge. It's up to you to learn what men really want and how to attract men with the real value and power of YOU...
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