How Does A Man Act When He's Falling In Love? 17 Signs You Missed!
By: Carlos Cavallo
You ever found yourself looking for clues about how he feels about you? You might have even asked yourself: "How does a man act when he's falling in love?"
That's a great question - because you need to know what a guy does and how he acts when he starts to fall for you. Without some clear signs of a man's interest, you don't want to waste your time, or risk embarrassment.
And the fact is that a lot of women miss men's signals because they don't know what to watch out for. If you don't see the signs up front, you could waste a lot of time with the wrong guy. OR you might wind up walking away from the right one!
First of all - let's be really clear: Falling in love is not what a guy does on the first night you meet him. Love is something that's cultivated over several months of being with a person. (I'll talk about "love at first sight" in another article coming soon...)
Sometimes his signals will be clear, and sometimes they will be strangely contradicting. Look, no one said this romance stuff was logical.
Wait - I take that back! It is logical - it's EMOTIONALLY logical.
And I also want you to turn off your ears when it comes to figuring out if he's in love with you by his words. If he SAYS he's in love with you, that's swell. But you need to SEE the proof in his actions before you believe it!
Now, there are a few things you should know about men's body language before we get started, though. I want to teach you how men show their emotions with their bodies. This will be different for men than women because of the differences in our psychology - and our physiology.
First off, let's start with the signs that aren't signs at all:
His lips part...
Yes, I saw this on a list of body language signals and I immediately started laughing. This is like saying "He likes you if his left pinky moves 1/64th of an inch." Micro signals like this are a complete waste of your time, and will probably ruin your chances with him.
His eyes dilate...
There are a million reasons why our pupils get larger - darker room, gastrointestinal difficulty, he's surprised... Looking at his eyes to catch a glimmer of hope that you might be walking down the aisle with him in a year is a complete waste of your energy.
He'll touch his chin/adjust his tie/straighten his jacket, etc.
Again, if the sign you're looking for is too common, it's no use to you. These are all signs of him working to look good for you, but that's about it.
His eyebrows do ... something...
I've heard it said that his eyebrows will go up, or arch, or wiggle, or something when he's falling for you. This is another of the silly body language signs that can't be interpreted like this. Don't get into really obscure and small signals or you'll miss the BIG picture.
He'll ... pull up his socks...
Yes, I saw this in an article from Today.com which claims this is a sign of interest from a man. This is ridiculous. Please don't believe this kind of nonsense. It will only give you false hope and leave you even more confused. Can you imagine telling him you knew he was falling for you when he ... pulled his socks up?
If he does hold back, he's probably got some psychological issues that you don't want to deal with. I'm completely serious about this. Men do NOT stop themselves from pursuing you if they're really in love with you. If he does hold back from his feelings, he's probably psychologically unbalanced and more into stalking you.
If he's still asking you out, if he's still trying to be around you, if he's still coming over to see you - he wants you. If he keeps choosing to be near you, you're going in the right direction!
And keep in mind that a man's body language isn't the only sign of his true feelings for you, either. You need to pay attention to his words - and even what he DOESN'T say.
What is probably confusing for many women, and why they ask this question about how does a man act when he's falling in love, is because a woman will get confused when a guy comes on strong and then suddenly seems to lose interest.
How can he do that when he was so clearly INTO you early on? It's weird and it feels like a mixed signal he's giving you.
Men Act Like This When In Love- #1: He's struttin' it...
Guys do a lot of showboating when they're attracted to a girl. I can still remember that feeling as a young man when I knew the girls were checking us out and were appraising which one of the guys they had set their sights on. I could actually feel their eyes on me, and it was an exhilarating feeling. My hormone levels went through the roof, and I felt invincible. It was almost like an out-of-body experience.
Is he trying to impress you?
A guy who's showing off also leads to a ton of other guy behaviors, like bragging, stupid risk taking, and even fighting.
There's just something that takes over a man's body when he smells that scent of sexual conquest in the air. His brain hormones shift over into "Alpha" mode and he becomes a testosterone-soaked tiger.
It's probably the most obvious of all the signals that a man gives.
And it's not just for when he first meets you - and it's also not just for "younger women" either.
When He's Falling For You - #2: He's seriously quiet with you...
A guy gets to a point where he wants to start making his real moves with you - and this usually happens by date #3. It's no coincidence that most people jump in bed by this date. A woman usually feels she "knows him" well enough, and the guy is now going to be pushing forward to get to home base.
So he's going to turn from the playful, joking kind of guy to the one that suddenly wants to turn on the R&B records and get those lights down real low.
You probably won't hear any complaints if you tell him you want to light a few candles. Hey, he's probably already lit a few in the bedroom already.
His quietness is because he's ready to stop talking and start getting physical with you. He's going to be driven by his hormones to start touching you more and being a whole lot closer.
You'll also notice his eye contact is starting to get really sultry. He's got those proverbial "bedroom eyes."
When He's Falling For You - #3: You're His Choice...
He's choosing you over video games...
He's choosing you over his buddies...
He's choosing you over that weekend trip...
This is where a guy will start to make you a priority. You'll rise up to the top of his list - just like that.
And if you know how to handle this stage, you can keep him keeping YOU right there - as a priority. I'll tell you more about that later.
When He's Falling For You - #4: It's PDA time...
And I don't mean "personal digital assistant," either. He's going to want to show his affection for you (also known as being "territorial") in public.
Don't be surprised if he's holding your hand, putting his arm around you, giving you a peck on the cheek...
All kinds of PDAs for all occasions. This is how a man physically feels your presence and love.
A guy wants to take care of his woman, and you may start to notice this from him. His attention will be on your happiness.
Is he showing you his "softer" side?
Women may roll their eyes about a guy's desire to fix things for you, but this is serious stuff. Drop the eye rolling and realize that a guy's most important drive when he's in love is making you happy.
If you short-circuit that, you're going to see him disappear in no time at all.
So indulge him. Let him take care of you.
You deserve this, right?
When He's Falling For You - #6: You're His Circle...
Another key sign of how a man acts when he's falling in love is that he starts to pull you into his inner circle. You'll meet his friends, his family, and the people that are important to him.
Don't underestimate the importance of this.
And - on the other side of the coin - if he doesn't introduce you to family & friends, he's got you in the holding zone.
“If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay.” – Oprah Winfrey
When He's Falling For You - #7: He's The Middle Man...
A guy who is falling in love will start to concede some things when it comes to making the relationship work. A guy who may have been pretty strict with his time will start to loosen it up to include you more.
Is he willing to compromise?
If he's the kind of guy that only goes to Phish concerts, but now he's going with you to Iron Maiden or Metallica, well that's a sign he's compromising to meet you in the middle.
When He's Falling For You - #9: He Wants The Deets...
A guy who's falling in love with you will also want to know more ABOUT you. He'll ask questions about your day-to-day life, as well as your history.
He might even sound a bit like an interviewer. He'll be asking you all kinds of questions to fill in the picture of you in his mind.
When He's Falling For You - #10: It's A Celebration...
Another thing a healthy, love-smitten guy will do is to celebrate your successes with you. He'll be a good cheerleader for you when the time calls for it.
Maybe he shows up at your work with a couple celebration cupcakes over a promotion. Or he'll take you to dinner when you get that first poem published.
He'll find a reason to make you a focal point of the celebration.
When He's Falling For You - #11: He's THAT Guy...
Yeah, there's the kind of guy that you just can't figure out. He just doesn't strike you as reliable. In fact, you suspect he's likely to flake out on you at the first excuse.
But THIS guy... he's not like that. You feel safe, and relaxed with him. You don't have that suspicious voice in your head telling you to watch out, something's up.
This is a good sign, because your intuition would be prodding you and letting you know if this guy was a problem for you.
When He's Falling For You - #12: He Knows He's Not The Sun...
It's a step in the right direction when your man knows that the world (and you) do not revolve around him.
He'll defer to your decision on occasion. And he's willing to explore new things if it's something you say you'd like to do. In fact, when a guy stops going along and resists everything you want, that's a sign of him losing his feelings of love.
When He's Falling For You - #13: He's Got A Map...
When two people create a relationship, they also start creating a map of the other person. You can call this a Love Map if you like.
It's all the information we store away about the other person, like how they like their eggs, and what shows they watch, and how they handle their emotions, as well as conflict. And it's this map that allows us to navigate the tricky space between two people.
He's planning a future with you in it...
If your man has this map of you, where he gets you and knows how you think and feel - and he knows how to adjust for your oddities - that's a guy that's in love.
He's also showing an advanced skill of relationships - that the details count. He knows the little things about you, and that's a sign of a strong and healthy relationship as well.
When He's Falling For You - #14: Together Is Better...
When a guy is more inclined to want to do something WITH you than without you, that's a huge sign of how he acts when he's in love. He'll make the conscious decision to include you on the little stuff, like trips to the grocery and such.
When a guy does this, he's also experiencing you like a companion - which is a huge sign of love and bonding from a man.
When He's Falling For You - #15: He Starts Locking It...
He wants to make you the only ONE...
When a guy really feels like you're The One for him, he's going to want to lock you down. What that means is that he will:
Want to make sure you two are exclusive...
Will ask questions about anyone else in your life...
Start planning future stuff with you to establish your "togetherness"
Start referring to you as his "girlfriend" - or other terms of endearment...
Start making you the center of his life...
When He's Falling For You - #16: He Leaves The Buttons Alone...
This one is huge, and it's surprising how many women let this happen in their relationships.
When a guy is in love with you, one thing he will NOT do is push your buttons and work to agitate you. (In fact, when a guy does this later in your relationship, it's a whole different ball game, but that's something I'll cover in another article.)
A man that loves you is not going to set out to hurt you - or your feelings.
If he's dismissive, hurtful, inconsiderate - and he sees that it hurts you, he's not your love. He's acting out against you, and you cannot allow him to do that.
When He's Falling For You - #17: He Will Return Your Calls & Texts...
This one is tricky, because you might think that since he started out doing this early on that it will mean he won't stop calling you and returning your texts right away.
But the gloss of the new relationship will eventually fade... Most guys do not keep up the same level of interaction later in the relationship. Mostly because they often see a woman's attempts to connect as trying to restrict his freedom.
He makes your calls a priority...
However, a guy that is in a balanced and caring relationship will respond to texts and calls considerately.
The problem happens when women abuse texting and turn it into a digital leash. Or as a way to soothe her fears and insecurities by keeping tabs on him.
Remember: Less is more when it comes to messaging and "keeping tabs" on your love. He wants you to connect, but to do it considerately of him.
REMEMBER: Body language signals are not to be taken as definite signs of a guy's interest. When a guy falls in love, he acts from a variety of instincts. Not all of these are obvious, and not all of them are accurate.
If you FEEL like he's into you, he probably is. And if he's doing any of the following, there's a really good chance he's falling in love:
Checking in on you...
Helping you out - financially as well as with effort...
Supportive of your dreams and desires...
Stares at you...
Leaves stuff at your place...
Lets you leave your stuff at his...
Lets you answer his phone...
These are all awesome and show you how he acts when he's in love.
But you know what?
It doesn't matter what signs you see if you don't know HOW TO KEEP HIM IN LOVE!
A woman doesn't lose her man because she missed some hidden body language signal. She lost him because she said something or did something that turned him off so much that he decided you weren't worth it.
Men do this all the time. We can change our minds in a few days about whether or not we're into you. But to be honest, if our minds change too soon and too easily, we were never really all that into you.
Very frequently women peruse these lists of love signals because they're insecure about where they stand with a guy. She wants some reassurance that he's into her, mostly because she can't handle too much uncertainty - AND because she never really learned to trust her own instincts.
Women often go looking for lists of "how to know if he's in love with you" because they know they're just looking for a little hope. You can ALWAYS find a sign that he loves you - or is falling in love with you - if you look hard enough.
But honestly, you don't need signs to guide you.
The women who really get men - I mean understand guys - as well as GETthe man she wants, these women KNOW men. It's on a whole other level.
They know how men think, how they act, how they feel, and what they respond to.
Most women will never take the time to discover these secrets.
It used to be that your mom would educate you about men, but that's rapidly disappearing as more and more women date, get married, have kids, and get divorced all by the time they're 30 - or older!
Most women these days have missed out on the most vital education of all - the understanding of how men work!
Do you know what men really mean when they say: "I'd like to call you again..." - but he doesn't call you again?
Do you know what a guy wants when he says he: "Likes things the way they are..." ?
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